stinks

We ran out of dog food a few days ago, so we've been feeding him peanut butter sandwiches. (What else?) The problem with peanut butter sandwiches as dog food is that they make that 15-year old black lab fart. Stinky stinky big dog farts. He'll walk into the living room, let one rip (usually inaudibly, but not always) and go back to the bedroom. That's awesome. He knows how to clear a room, that's for sure. Stinky farts disturb my tv / internet time and even wake me up from deep sleep, by sucking all my nice clean air out and replacing it with all that is evil and unholy in the world.

We do feed him pills that are supposed to make him less stinky, but I can't actually tell if they work. All I know is, my neighbors must think poor Midnight gets beaten or something, by the way we're I'm always yelling "Got dang dog! I will drown you in butt water!"






*That is a threat I recently yelled, but it was aimed at the cat who really wanted to drink my water, then decided it would be best to put his tail in it.