Dear lady on the train,

I saw you. I saw what you did. I saw you get on the subway and glance nervously between the seats. One side was empty save for 2 young black guys wearing baggy jeans and nice hats and sneakers. The other side was very crowded, with only a smidgen of space between the white girl with her white boyfriend and the young Asian chick reading a book. I saw when you clenched your bag a little tighter with one more furtive glance at the black guys and then tried to squeeze your big butt into the non-space between me and the Asian chick.

Did we look "safer" to you? The fact that you made all of us physically uncomfortable by sitting by us made me want to make it not so safe. I wanted to tear your big purse out of your hand and throw it across the train, just so you would have to leave and go get it and we could sit comfortably again. Sitting on the other side would have been easier for everyone. The black guys wouldn't have bothered you, and there was plenty of room for you to stretch out and even put your purse on the seat next to you, not that you would have done that.

You're a racist. And a sexist. And homophobic. And anti-Semitic. It doesn't matter. They're all the same thing.



ps - (not to the lady) - I invented a new necklace. I'm a genius.