Thursday, August 16, 2007

creepy, creepy store

I can remember it clearly.

I'm being chased down a dark alley into a store. I slam the door behind me and feel only temporary relief, as the old lady sitting in a dentist's chair, knitting with a dog in her lap, warns me against trying to pet dogs in cases. I turn slowly. The dusty, musty, slightly sour smell gets stronger. I pick up an old photograph lying on a table. It is from the late 1800s, a photographic case study of psoriasis. I feel I am being watched. When I turn my head, the cracked porcelain doll to my right turns his head as well. His hinged joints point to his bretheren; some are headless. Some are stuffed into jars. But all begin to move and chase me down a long corridor, riddled with cobwebs. At the end, another photograph, this one poster-sized. It is my grandmother in her coffin. She sits up, points at me, and laughs an evil laugh. I try to flee but there are animals blocking my every move. All frozen in time and mid-action, there are birds, fish, dogs, cats, ferrets, and many things I cannot place. Sometimes I see only the foot of an animal, transformed into some macabre object d'art or an ashtray. I keep running, only to find skeletons and organ-men, with all their parts labeled in neat Victorian handwriting. Soon the skeletons regrow into people, complete in Victorian costume. Shoes, hats, corsets, dresses, where did these things come from? And then I see it. An old family photo album. Inside are the people wearing these clothes. They were doctors, artists, devoted to their families and pets. I am somehow near the door again. The old lady is still there, slowly rocking. "Have a nice day"she creaks as I walk back into daylight.

The preceding account is true. While researching for Suzanne's book about odd things to do in NYC, des and Suzanne stumbled into Obscura Antiques & Oddities. Oddities, you say? Yes, very much so.

This is the store of my nightmares.

7 comments:

flutter said...

That IS creepy! I love it.

super des said...

I'd buy you something from there, but you know, creepy.

Alex Elliot said...

That's the type of writing that should be in the DaVinci Code :)

super des said...

ha ha ha. The DaVinci code wishes.

Suzanne said...

Crap, you should write parts of this book. Too nicely done. Now I'm worried that I'll wind up locked up in a case in the store while you run off with the book. Mwa ha ha ha.

Seriously, I am so glad that you were with me. If only I had your company the day before, when I went to El Indio Amazonico

super des said...

Nightmares don't sell travel books.

Suzanne said...

But they are fucking brilliant pieces of writing.

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