Sunday, August 26, 2007

answer me these questions three. Er, five. (post #2 today)

The other day, my Discover Magazine came in the mail. So I'm going along, happy as a dinosaur robot, reading about space and fossils and computers and stuff, when I see an ad for this product. Better Sex Now! it proclaims to the world. Personally, I don't need a product for better sex now, and I think it is misplaced in the pages of Discover. In fact, if you look at the website, it shows the mags it advertises in: Cosmo, Playboy, Men's Health, etc. For some reason I don't think a science mag fits in.

The thing that got me about the print ad was the picture of the couple that had assumedly benefited from this product.

This is a very attractive couple. I might even go so far as to say they are both more attractive than the average print ad model. So what's the ad logic here? If I learn better sex, I will get to have sex with one (or both!) of these people? Will I feel so confident about my sexual prowess that my inner beauty will shine through and I will end up looking like one (or both?) of these people? Or is this the couple that "acts" in the - let's face it - porno videos I buy when ordering this product?

Conversely, will I be disappointed when my sexual partner does not resemble one (or both) of these people? What if I'm great at sex, meet these people, and find out they are arrogant twits with the conversation skills of a busted walnut? Will my sex still be great even with the lack of emotional interest? (That's a loaded question, btw.)

And I repeat: Why are they advertising in a science magazine? Is this set of videos scientifically proven? Do science nerds need better sex just as a general rule? I have to admit, I take a little offense to that last one. (Didn't these people ever see Revenge of the Nerds? "Jocks only think about sports, nerds only think about sex.")

Yeah so anyway, I'm stumped on many levels. Can someone please explain the world to me?

ps - C walked in while I was looking at the website and got a little freaked out. When I told him it was for research on a feminist rant, he was ok with it. Sucker! ha ha ha ha

pps - I can't wait to see what kind of google hits I get now.


Brillig said...

Haha. I most certainly cannot explain it, but I love that C walked in and saw you looking at this stuff. HAHAHAHA.

super des said...

Well he was bound to walk in at some point...

Suzanne Reisman said...

Ha ha ha.

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