pee problems

Yesterday I did a pre-make up session at the shelter. All the dogs had been walked, so we were playing. Apparently dear Lundy hadn't been walked quite enough so she relieved herself a large puddle on the floor. Some of it got on the mat carpet. I tried to keep it from spreading and soaking more than the corner of the mat, so I picked it up and was gingerly rolling the dripping end inside the rest when this stupid woman who I've never seen before and hope to never see again took it from me. This action induced a downpour of dog pee all over my nice white shirt.

Why would you wear a nice white shirt to go play with doggies? Because I came straight from work and was honestly not expecting a pee-soaked mat to come in contact with my shirt.

I looked down at my shirt, which was not soaked but more wet with pee than I normally prefer, and stared at the woman. "Oh well, it will drip dry." She said this to me. "Actually that end is soaked with dog pee and I was trying not to get it everywhere, like on my shirt." I'm a total bitch, but she got dog pee on my shirt. She didn't talk to me anymore, and I left soon after.

It wasn't a big deal. I was going straight home, and nobody could see it (though I could feel it being wet). As soon as I was in the house, my shirt was on the floor (woo!) and eventually into the laundry hamper. I was going to wash it right then, but it was too damn hot. Not like today. A cool 101 with 60% humidity.

That was yesterday. Here is today.

I follow a routine. Normally I wake up when the sun shines in my face at 5am. I throw a mini-tantrum and force myself into a fitful sleep until my cell phone / alarm goes off at 7. That's right, I wake up to the Batman Theme. I slowly focus my eyes on the clock and pet the cat, who is invariably sleeping next to my feet and unnecessarily keeping them toasty warm. I stumble to the bathroom and take a shower. When I'm done, I finish getting ready. I have become accustomed to this ritual uninterrupted.

Not this morning. Craig was not fast enough to use the potty before I got in the shower, so I was bombarded by pounding on the door and shouting that I could barely hear. I was finally able to discern "I really gotta pee!" from amongst the pouring water and the door pounding. I step out of the shower, leave the water running, grab a towel, and march into the kitchen. I am nearly trampled by the man (boy?) running into the bathroom.

I stand in the kitchen, dripping wet, and naked except for the towel, which is wrapped around my shoulders like a blanket. The AC is on, which normally I am grateful for, but today it is giving me hypothermia. After an eternity, a much-relieved looking Craig emerges from the bathroom. Now it is he who is nearly trampled as I burst back into the bathroom towards my warm warm shower. I barely hear his apology as I simultaneously drop the towel, slam the door, and jump back into the shower.

I try not to make it a habit of literally jumping into the shower, as I am very good at falling and breaking things, especially myself. But the Shower Gods were smiling on me today as I rushed through the rest of my shower and proceeded (so far) to have a semi-normal day.