When I was learning to drive, I heard that if you are ever about to be in a head-on collision, veer to the the right because the other driver's instincts will also lead to the right; thus, you will either avoid each other or drive off a cliff, or both. Yes, you can still have a collision in mid-air. That's the worst kind. This seems like a good system. I've never tried it out, myself, but it seems like at least if everyone is in agreement then things should work themselves out fine. Unless you're in England, or one of those "other" countries where people drive on the left. This could cause problems.
I think we need a universal rule like this for sidewalk or hall walking. Pedestrian head-ons occur much more than car, truck, boat, or tractor head-ons. Some people veer to the right, but some to the left. This often leads to statements such as "I'm sorry" / "Excuse me"/ "Wanna dance?" or "Get out of my way, you ugly cow pusher!" If everyone agreed on a swerving direction, situations like this could be avoided.
Get the world leaders together for a conference. They will agree on a direction. My vote goes to right, because not everyone can turn left, as evidenced in the movie "Zoolander." They will also decide on a date for everyone to make the switch. Saturday at midnight, everyone must start turning right in order to avoid sidewalk crashing. Nevermind the time difference - if you are close enough to run into someone, then you are probably in the same time zone as them. There are a few exceptions to this, but if you know you are going to be near another time zone at switch-time, then you should switch at their time (moving eastward, of course). Also, so few people will be in this situation that I feel they should be able to work it out themselves.
So this is my proposal. Someone call the UN. Make me the ambassador of Walking Goodwill. So many injuries and embarrassments could be avoided, not to mention the many wars started when someone from Franco-Prussia and someone from Austria-Hungary try to avoid a hallway collision, only to crash a few feet over instead. I'm really trying to change the world here.
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4 comments:
Great proposition, Des. But then I would have to remember what directions right and left were.
Here's what I do and it works: when someone is heading for me, I look down at their feet and keep going straight ahead. They go around me. I have no idea if this will work in the NYC zoo. I thought ppl there would be expert walkers.
In general, most of the people walk ok. However, with this many people, there are bound to be some not-good walkers.
I'm for the right. When I'm on the cat walk, the NYC sidewalk, every time I attempt a left I'm sluggish and end up getting run into. But I've yet to be called a ugly cow pusher. Again with the references to cows in NYC. You need a cow tattoo.
Then people would ask why I have a cow tattoo... I can't just say cows are cool, like I can with the bat & the penguin. I'd have to explain that I have a mild form of tourettes which leads me to mention cows almost constantly.
that would be really really funny. I think this is the reason I'm not allowed to get tattooed while drunk. Inevitably, it would be a cow and that would be stupid. Ha Ha Ha.
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