des should be in pictures!

So I know what I need to do with my life. I know what my vocation should be. But I need to move to Los Angeles for it.

I need to be a performer. Rock star, actress, model - I can do all these things. In fact, I often do - just nobody pays me for it (or when they do, it's not enough to live off of). However, Asheville isn't the place to be for this. Yeah, I've gotten some modeling work, but I never tried doing that anywhere else so I don't know what that means.

But it would be great. I would get to have fun AND make money. I wouldn't have to deal with nutbag customers around the holidays, or incompetent bosses that can't understand logic. Sure, I might have an erratic schedule that involves lots of traveling, but I would also get to choose what I wanted to do. And I'm not saying it would be easy work. But dag nabbit, I would enjoy it!

I seriously am considering moving to L.A. I mean I want to move back to CA anyway, so this is a good reason. Now to find a way to get there and a place to live...

this week in the life of des

The other day, Jessica took us hiking. Well, hiking's a bit of an exaggeration - it was a fairly easy uphill trail that was less than a mile. But I had my camera along of course and took lots of pictures. Go check them out at my flickr. I'm too lazy to upload all 68 pics to blogger because the system sucks. Also I think they're all pretty darn good so I didn't want to just choose a few. There are lots of landscapes, and a few of me, Jason, Jessica, and the dog Femi. I'm sure I'll go hiking again soon. And take more pictures.

In other news, I had a second interview for the job I want at the grocery store. This time I was meeting the store manager. I think it went well, but the store manager was much more businessy and less personable than the other guy I was talking to. We were talking about me benig a vegetarian, and the store manager said "well I do have an opening in the meat department. Would you be willing to work there?" I told him it's definitely not my first choice, but I would glady take something over nothing. Plus there is always the possibility of advancement and / or switching departments, which is one of the points they kept repeating. I couldn't tell if it was a "test" or if there really is an opening there. This interview wasn't as long as last time's (but how could it be - that was an hour and a half!). I asked if the first guy still wanted me to call and check in on Tuesday, and he said "Definitely - unless I call you first!" so the second interview definitely ended on a high note.

I keep having dreams about getting a puppy. I don't even know if we're ready for a new puppy yet (we haven't technically moved into our own place yet), but there was an ad on craigslist for border collie / austrailian shepherd puppies being weaned at the end of this month. They were only $25. I would love to have that kind of dog, but Jay wants another lab. So we'll see.

Other than that, I still keep on keeping on.


edited to add: I just got a call saying I didn't get the job in the meat department. But he's going to pass my info on to another department, and apparently I did impress the store manager. I didn't want to work with meat anyway.

boys say the darndest things

This may be only funny to me, but I thought I'd share.

Jay is a notorious sleep talker. Sometimes he just mumbles, but sometimes he forms coherent (or semi-coherent, anyway) sentences. When we were in Florida last year, he woke me up by saying "Slap that bitch on the ho." I said excuse me? and then he said. "What can I do for you?" like he was some sort of snotty hotel concierge being polite, but still somehow being a jerk. In his sleep.

Then the other night, he woke me up with this conversation:

Jay: There's aspirin on the wall.
me: What?
Jay: Aspirin.
me: Aspirin?
Jay: Painkillers!
me: I don't know what you're talking about.
Jay: There are 7 or 8 aspirin on the wall! (frustrated, gets up)
me: Don't start a discussion with me until you can make sense! (I go back to sleep.)

I honestly had no idea what he was talking about because I was dead asleep when he suddenly starts talking about aspirin. I clarified that he was indeed talking about aspirin, but it didn't help me understand. Then he was mad at me for having no clue. Of course he had no recollection of this until the next morning when he remembered going to the bathroom in the middle night. He wasn't going to bring it up in case I forgot, but I did not forget. And I won't let him forget either.



ps - I realized I've stopped commenting on blogs, even though I am reading them. I'll try to fix that.

my political dream

**Preface: though I am about to talk about current presidential candidates, my subconscious has no bearing on my political affiliations, so this is in no way an endorsement for one over the other.**

I have weird dreams all the time. This isn't to say much, as dreams are weird by nature. But I generally remember my dreams so I can tell other people about them. However, recently I have discovered that if I eat a bowl of Lucky Charms immediately preceding sleep, my dreams are extra strange.

Like this one, for example:

I was out walking Midnight when he started to seizure. When this happens in real life, Jason is there to jump on the dog and hold him steady while speaking calmly to relax him. In the dream, Jay wasn't there, so I had to do all this myself. But apparently I'm too small to do this, as dream-me was thrown around by the dog fit, and suffered soreness and bruising the rest of the dream. (I wonder what was happening in real life to me?)

So with my soreness, I went to work or school or wherever I was supposed to be. Then Barack Obama was making an appearance, but he wasn't a keynote speaker or anything, and he didn't have any security with him. At one point, I saw Obama and was like "hey, can I take a picture with you?" He agreed, and we posed for a self-portrait. He took the picture because his arms are longer than mine, I'm assuming. When we turned the cam around to view the picture, my face was at a weird angle so it looked like I was kissing his neck. And he was doing something with his finger that looked like he was picking his nose. I was like "we should take a better picture, this might not be good for your career." And he said to just photoshop it to make it look right. I decided that he was a little crazy and I didn't want to talk to him any more so I left.

I went to go get my drink that I had left on a table, and 2 guys were playing Dungeons & Dragons there. They didn't like being interrupted, so they threw their juice at me. I wasn't soaked enough, so they also threw my drink at me, all over my shoes. Rightly so, I was pissed off, so I went to another room and announced that the D&D nerds were jerks. Apparently I have a lot of sway, because the juice throwers became even less popular than they were before.

I was still mad, so I decided to tell Hillary Clinton, who of course was also there. I couldn't get in to talk with her because she was busy (apparently busier than Obama) but then I remembered that I'd met her before because she is my friend Clair's mom. (Duh. Of course.) So I wrote her a note, explaining my displeasure with the juice throwers.

I don't think it was resolved, as at that point in real life the cat was snuggling with me so I woke up.

des as dream lecturer

Last night I had a dream that my niece was off to college. She was very excited as her first day approached, and everyone was giving her advice and stuff.
Being the young cool aunt that I am, I pulled her aside and gave her the following speech:

"Everyone always says, don't do drugs or drink or have sex while you're in college. But we both know that you're going to. So speaking from experience, do all you want, just plan for it. Make sure you have no homework or papers to write on a night when you get smashed."

The funny thing is that besides the fact that my niece still has 2 more years before I would theoretically have this conversation. Also, it's not a philosophy I myself followed. I was more of a prude than a Girl Gone Wild (though I did partake in my share).