Friday, May 25, 2007

kill him

Ok, this is my 3rd post today. Sorry.

One of my pet peeves is Elevator People. Not just people who ride elevators, but people who push the buttons multiple times or stand in the way. Basically anyone who makes me hate them because of their behavior and lack of etiquette.

For example, today I went to go get the mail. Arms full, I waited for the elevator to stop on the 3rd floor and pick me up. When the doors opened, I tried walking inside. But no. There was an Elevator Person pressing the "close doors" button repeatedly, so the doors closed. On me. I said "can you wait until the people get inside the elevator before you close it?" with more than a little attitude. He laughed that punk-ass kid-laugh that seems to be so common around here (because everyone's an "artist") and said "I didn't know there was anyone getting inside."

I killed him with my eyes and thought "Why the fuck do you think the elevator stopped? Not that you gave it a chance to do anything before you started jamming the button." Luckily it is a very short ride from the 3rd floor to the 5th, where I get off. As the doors opened, I turned to that guy, again killing him with my eyes - daring him to press the button again - and called him an idiot. He laughed his punk ass kid laugh again and I hoped the elevator cables would snap.

But now thanks to him, I have an elevator door-shaped welt on my arm and lots of muscle pain. If I ever see that guy again, I'm going to stab him in the neck.


viciousrumours said...

See, had it been me I would have stayed on the elevator, not saying a thing, glaring at him. I would have inched closer and closer, glaring the whole time. I would have ridden past my floor, even when the doors opened. If he had said anything about it being my stop I would have simply smiled a lopsided smile and inched closer.

When he got off, I would have hissed, "moron" . Then everytime I saw him I would have said something like,"Figured out how those buttons work yet or are you still having to press them repeatedly to make sure they light up?"

But then, I'm patient and kind of psychotic like that.

super des said...

Yeah, I'm not patient at all and I will probably never see him again.

Suzanne said...

I am glad that you called him a name as you got off. And I am sorry that the elevator cable did not snap. And on fact, I had a very similar elevator experience this morning, although I do not have an injury because the elevator assholes successfully slammed the door in my face.

flutter said...


Brillig said...

This is the THIRD post I've read this week about elevator ettiquette! How funny! I didn't know that there was this whole crazy world of rude elevator riders! What a pain! I, too, love that you called him a name as you left the elevator. hahaha.

super des said...

I think if my arms hadn't been full and in pain I would have done a lot more than call him a name.

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