First of all, I want to thank Des for having me at her blog today. It is not often that big stars such as myself get to hang out with common folk. A world that isn’t full of Tiffany’s and $600 panties is a bit new to me, but I am sure I will adjust. My agent has suggested that I not use my real name here today, but I am sure you can guess who I am.
Speaking of $600 panties, I was out on one of my shopping trips and two guys totally starting fighting over me. Now, I have to make it look like I am annoyed by the attention of young, adoring men, but we all know that I love it. Even if they do have a camera stuck to their face. They did get a little brutal though as you can see in this video.
Luckily, the mall that I was at has a great security staff that came to my rescue. Can you imagine if they would have got a better picture of me with my hair pulled back like that? I could have been the next Tyra Banks story in the tabloids! That could have spelled tragedy for my carreer that I am desperately trying to salvage. Why else would I do movies that focus solely on my sex appeal? Which I might add, is really sexy. Johnny Knoxville told me so.
Anyway, I was totally getting to like a point there. Oh yeah, the mall security jumped in and took those guys with the cameras down. People were trying to say they will get in trouble. Are you kidding me? That would just be, like, wrong or something. They were trying to keep my beautiful, and no longer acne scared thanks to Proactive face(they pay me to say that)out of the tabloids. After my divorce, reality TV diaster, and my confusion over chicken and fish, I can't afford too mamny more oppsies.
Do you think they should get in trouble?
Thank you for reading my sillyness today. Did you guess who that was? I have really enjoyed this opportunity to Blog Exchange with Des. You can find more of me over at Mommy the Maid. I am a stay at home mom to two beautiful girls and also design and make children’s clothing. I love all things crafty and love to write sarcastic and snarky blog posts. I strongly believe in creativity in all ages and hope that you will come to visit and share in mine.
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7 comments:
Too easy, Jessica Simpson! Thanks for blogging today -- I think this whole blog exchange thing is great. It's like the foreign exchange program; we like to have the foreigners around, but don't turn them into lifelong friends. (I'm just kidding -- I have no idea what kind of piss I'm talking half the time.)
Ah Count, you make me laugh.
Honestly, you were too coherent (and smart!)to be Jessica.
I'd listen pretty close to anything Johnny Knoxville said, too. A guy that hot knows sexy.
I need to read People more often, or stop watching Jon Stewart.
My knowledge of young starlets is occupying so much valuable real estate upstairs. Damn, though truth be told I thought at first blush it was La Lohan.
Wow, see, without the video I couldn't get it.
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